Memoir

It was two weeks before spring break and I was failing three of my four classes. I probably had not actually put full effort into anything the entire semester. (Mind you I was a second year freshman because I got instate residency the year before so I could only take 6 credits per semester). I would go to school most days. A normal day started with me waking up late and then rushing into my car. I would turn onto the freeway and proceed to speed the entire way to school. Usually, I was late already, but then I had to find parking on Helen Ave. because I decided I’d rather do that all semester than buy a parking pass. This usually took anywhere from five to ten minutes depending on the day. Then I literally ran to work and was by then five to ten minutes late. I would sit down at my desk and then call down to my bosses to let them know that I was indeed there. Next, I usually pushed off my homework that I should’ve been doing then (my job is to wait by a phone at the admissions office so I usually can do homework then). Instead I would put some ESPN on the computer screen and would continue to waste my time. Occasionally answering questions from prospective students and their parents who had come in for a campus tour. Then after a couple hours of that go bye, I would go sit in class and struggle to pay attention. Often checking my Instagram and replying to messages on SnapChat from friends instead paying attention like I should’ve been. After my classes went bye I would head home. Instead of starting my homework when I got home like I should’ve I usually decided to play one game of Fortnite. One game turned into four or five. And if I wasn’t playing Fortnite or watching TV it was usually because one of my friends had called and asked if I could hangout. I would of course say yes to this then proceed to go over to their house and hangout for a few hours or more and then come home having done absolutely none of my homework and stressing because I had such little time to do my homework. Or if I did indeed play video games after about the fifth game I would usually decide that I had had enough. Then and only then, I would usually decide that it was finally time that I start my homework. Unfortunately, it was usually around ten or eleven pm. I pull up my laptop and then attempt to try doing my homework. What usually happened next was either I realized that the homework that I was going to do was either already late or it was due at twelve that night. If I was lucky enough to have gotten to it be before it was due I would usually rush through the homework putting the least amount of work into as possible as well as learning the least that I possibly could. Usually it was around eleven thirty or twelve by then so after that I would watch an episode of Schitt’s Creek and then head to bed.

I had a problem with procrastination. These habits had been formed at the very beginning of my school career and had always been how I had done every school year. I have a vivid memory of my teacher yelling at me in second grade because my late work folder was full to the brim while everyone else’s was empty or at least close to it. Despite how much my mom(who is a teacher and pushed me every year like I was one of her students) pushed me to get my grades up and work harder in my classes I had never listened. But, I was yet to have it affect my grades this bad. I had always skimmed bye in every class with a C- or C in most classes in high school and my first year and half of college with the exception of one math class that I got a D in my freshman year here.

So now that I was failing 3 of my four classes I FINALLY realized how big of a problem this was. I for the first time in my life started to look at my assignments the day I was assigned them and not the morning it was due. I started to get caught up in all my classes and finally was putting 110% into everything that I was doing. I started waking up early everyday(this was perhaps the hardest change of all) and getting to both work and class early, asking questions when I had them instead of just not asking them. I actually started to try on my homework and put my full effort into every assignment. I started making flashcards for classes weeks before tests instead of hours. The next thing I knew I started getting ahead in my classes. Yet, it seemed like I was still was not doing enough. My grades were raising but I had been so far behind before that it felt like I would never be able to get to where I needed to be. But instead of quitting like I would’ve in the past I pushed even harder. Also, before I had always assumed that I did poorly in school because I was dumb and just incapable of learning as well as other students. This was the first time in my life I realized that if I put the work in when I’m supposed to then I truly am capable of doing well in all of my classes rather than just barely skimming bye. And the results speak for themselves, I turned those three F’s and one C- into three B’s and an A. This was by far the best that I had ever done in my entire school career. Now my mission is to not let this momentum die. I want to continue to do my best and I’m shooting for all A’s this semester.